Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Conditions to Happiness

Got a mail from my darling about happiness. You know, those mails that are suppose to uplift you with inspiring words and phrases, that say don’t wait till you have money, till you go back to college, till you pay off the mortgage and etc.
 
But you know what? I don’t think I can wait anyway… because I’m so goddamn impatient and procrastinative and impulsive and impetuous sometimes. I know, very contradictory, but there it is.
 
So here goes.
 
I don’t think I can wait…
 
“Until your car or home is paid off.”

Because I don’t have a car (paid by my dad anyway! Muahahaha) and a home (also paid by my dad anyway! Muahahahhahaahahhaahaaa)
 
“Until you get a new car or home.”

Hmm… seeing that I have no savings, and no inclination as to where I will be next year, I’ll hold off on both.
 
“Until your kids leave the house. “
I don’t have kids now. Even if I do, I’ll probably take them with me on my pilgrimage to Tibet and Lourdes.
 
“Until you go back to school.”
Hell, there’s such a thing as, part time and one month deference. I think I would be working full time and studying one or two subjects in the evenings or stop work to study for one month, then head back to work, then stop again to work fulltime. I got time to kill.
 
“Until you finish school.”
Er… like I said, ‘Take your time!’
 
“Until you lose 10 lbs.”
I’m comfortable with my weight, thank you! I may never reach the size and weight of Kate Moss, but life is full of disappointments anyway!
 
“Until you gain 10 lbs.”
What are you? Stupid?? Who wants to gain 10 more pounds? Hello?!!
 
“Until you get married.”
I’m cohabitating. Don’t believe in this so-called ‘sacred’ institution of marriage.
 
“Until you get a divorce.”
See above.
 
“Until you have kids.”
Oh, that’s okay. I’m adopting.
 
“Until you retire.”
Don’t think I’ll ever retire. I believe in keeping one self occupied.
 
“Until summer.”
There’s no summer in Malaysia.
 
“Until spring.”
Nor Spring.
 
“Until winter.”
Nor Winter!
 
“Until fall.”
Any Rise?
 
“Until you die.”
Everyone has to die. But if anyone knows the secret to immortality, do let me know!!!